Screw the ESPN Body Issues. According to multiple articles on the Internet, the Dad-Bod is the new thing. That’s right, your father is America’s Sex Symbol. Who knew being mildly out of shape and aging was sexy?
Science has known for a long time women with daddy issues are insanely attracted to a certain type of man. Especially those who look like they work and play too hard to make that big volleyball tournament.
Hairy chest, beer guts, muffin tops, no biceps and black socks now trigger that same thing in all women.
This is excellent news for yours truly. My lust for IPA’s, lack of a razor and utter laziness have crafted the perfect Dad-Bod.
Move over Brad Pitt! CJ Morgan is in the house.