Surviving communist nuclear strike
Posted 4/1/2013 11:46:00 AM

Hello there! Is your city within range of potential communist enemy nuclear strike? Of course it is! With technological advances, the enemies of freedom can even attack you from outer space!  Let’s get you and your family prepared to survive a nuclear attack! First, build a bomb shelter. Stock it with a lot of essentials. Batteries. Flashlights, a radio tuned to 93.7 klbj. Some of the captains hobomen salted pork, cartons of lucky strike unfiltered 100’s.

Now, when you hear the nuclear attack SIRENS blaring in your city, just retreat and lock yourself in your shelter until the all clear is given. If you can not make it to your shelter intme, crawl under a solid wood desk or stand inbetween a doorway.

After the attack, remember to be weary of other humans as the radiation might have given them super powers or turned them in to zombies. Most studies show that the effects of prolongled radioactive exposure can cause the ability to read minds as well as a craving for tasty human flesh. Be sure to wear a tin foil hat and always carry a machete.

 That’s your tips for surviving a communist nuclear attack!

Posted By: CJ  
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