Advertisement

CJ's Blog

Blog > CJ's Blog > The Danger of Soccer Nip Slips

The Danger of Soccer Nip Slips

If Janet Jackson’s boob was so bad for America, can you imagine what is going to happen across the globe?

Janet Jackson’s wardrobe malfunction was the third most destructive event to happen in the modern United States behind only Pearl Harbor and 9/11. Her nip-slip caused a necessary censorship clampdown on the media (especially radio), gave the government more control than ever and damaged the lives of countless children.

FOLLOW @theCJMorgan | LISTEN 7p-12m | MORE klbjfm.com

Yet, no one is talked about an even more dangerous GLOBAL epidemic that is going on right under the Lady Liberty's' nose. Across the globe, millions of children and hundreds of stable societies are being subjected to wardrobe malfunctions of EPIC proportion.

Soccer may seem harmless but in reality it’s almost as popular (globally) as college football. However, it’s not pictures of sweet adolescents cheering on their school whilst earing a degree that’s being broadcast. Countless disturbing images and reports are coming back from games all over the globe. Hordes of loose women fill the stands at soccer stadiums and their clothing choices are destroying the brains of our youth, one nipple at a time.

The images below are shocking, but necessary in order for us to combat this great injustice. If Janet Jackson’s boob ruined America this bad, can you imagine what is going to happen across the globe?

More soccer fans:

The term of our 44th President, and one of the most controversial figures in politics is at an end. Thank God (a...
It has been less than a year since Miles, CJ’s best friend and paralyzed wiener of ten years passed ( watch Lil...
Every year I have a wonderful experience at the Austin City Limits Music Festival but every year several asshats...
"Love is cursed by monogamy." -Nietzsche It doesn't take a statistician to tell you that of your partner works...
Our life’s purpose forever changed the very moment chemistry and biology (my favorite seventh grade classes) took...